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What is narrative therapy? by Alice Morgan


Narrative therapy seeks to be a respectful, non-blaming approach to counselling and community work, which centres people as the experts in their own lives. It views problems as separate from people and assumes people have many skills, competencies, beliefs, values, commitments and abilities that will assist them to change their relationship with problems in their lives. Curiosity and a willingness to ask questions to which we genuinely don’t know the answers are important principles of this work. There are many possible directions that any conversation can take (there is no single correct direction). The person consulting the therapist plays a significant part in determining the directions that are taken.

It seems appropriate to begin any exploration of narrative therapy with a consideration of what is meant by the ‘narratives’ or ‘stories’ of our lives.
Understanding and living our lives through stories
Narrative therapy is sometimes known as involving ‘re-authoring’ or ‘re-storying’ conversations. As these descriptions suggest, stories are central to an understanding of narrative ways of working.
The word ‘story’ has different associations and understandings for different people. For narrative therapists, stories consist of:
events
linked in sequence
across time
according to a plot
As humans, we are interpreting beings. We all have daily experiences of events that we seek to make meaningful. The stories we have about our lives are created through linking certain events together in a particular sequence across a time period, and finding a way of explaining or making sense of them. This meaning forms the plot of the story. We give meanings to our experiences constantly as we live our lives. A narrative is like a thread that weaves the events together, forming a story.
We all have many stories about our lives and relationships, occurring simultaneously. For example, we have stories about ourselves, our abilities, our struggles, our competencies, our actions, our desires, our relationships, our work, our interests, our conquests, our achievements, our failures. The way we have developed these stories is determined by how we have linked certain events together in a sequence and by the meaning we have attributed to them.
An example: the story of my driving
I could have a story about myself as a ‘good driver’. This means I could string together a number of events that have happened to me whilst driving my car. I could put these events together with others into a particular sequence and interpret them as a demonstration of me being a good driver. I might think about, and select out for the telling of the story, events such as stopping at the traffic lights, giving way to pedestrians, obeying the speed limits, incurring no fines and keeping a safe distance behind other vehicles. To form this story about my ability as a driver, I am selecting out certain events as important that fit with this particular plot. In doing so, these events are privileged over others. For instance, the times when I pulled out too quickly from the curb or misjudged the distances when parking my car are not being privileged. In the retelling of stories, there are always events that are not selected, based upon whether or not they fit with the dominant plots.
In this example, perhaps why I can attend only to the good events, and have managed to construct a story of being a competent driver, is due to the reflections of others. If my family members and friends have always described me as a good driver, this would have made a significant difference. Stories are never produced in isolation from the broader world.
The dominant story of my driving abilities will not only affect me in the present but will also have implications for my future actions. For example, if I am asked to drive to a new suburb or drive a long distance at night, my decision and plans will be influenced by the dominant story I have about my driving. All stories are constitutive of life and shape our lives.
Our lives are multistoried. There are many stories occurring at the same time and different stories can be told about the same events. No single story can be free of ambiguity or contradiction and no single story can encapsulate or handle all the incidents of life.
If I had a car accident, or if someone in my life began to focus on every little mistake that I ever made while driving, an alternative story about my driving might begin to develop – a story of incompetence or carelessness. This alternative story would have effects too. For a time I might live with differing stories about my driving depending upon the context or the audience. Over time, depending on a variety of factors, the negative story about my driving might gain in influence and even become the dominant story in my life in relation to my driving. Neither the story of my driving ability nor the story of my driving failure would be free of ambiguity or contradiction.
Different types of stories
There are many different sorts of stories by which we live our lives and relationships – including stories about the past, present and future. Stories can also belong to individuals and/or communities. There can be family stories and relationship stories.
An individual may have a story about themselves as being successful and competent. Alternatively they may have a story about themselves as being ‘a failure at trying new things’ or ‘a coward’ or as ‘lacking determination’. Families may have stories about themselves as being ‘caring’ or ‘noisy’ or ‘risky’ or ‘dysfunctional’ or ‘close’. A community may have a story about itself as ‘isolated’ or ‘politically active’ or ‘financially strong’. All these stories could be occurring at the same time, and events, as they occur, will be interpreted according to the meaning (plot) that is dominant at that time. In this way, the act of living requires that we are engaged in the mediation between the dominant stories and the alternative stories of our lives. We are always negotiating and interpreting our experiences.
Stories in the therapeutic context
Let us think about some of the stories that are brought into the context of therapy. Most commonly, when people decide to consult a therapist it is because they are experiencing a difficulty or problem in their lives. When meeting with a therapist, they will often begin by telling the therapist about many events in the life of the problem for which they are seeking help. Commonly they will also explain the meanings they have given to these events.
The Craxton family sought my assistance when one of the members of the family, Sean, was caught stealing. As I heard about the problem of stealing, Sean’s parents explained:
We are really worried about Sean because he is stealing and we have tried to stop him but he just won’t. He’s always been a problem child from the time he was little. He didn’t get much attention when he was a small boy because Anne [his mother] was ill. Since then he always gets in trouble at school. He didn’t toilet train himself and is always starting fights with his brothers. Now he’s stealing to get people to notice him.
Within this story, Sean’s stealing was interpreted as meaning he was ‘attention seeking’. This particular meaning (or dominant plot) occurred through a gathering together of many other events in the past that fitted with this interpretation. As Sean more and more came to be seen according to this story, more and more events which supported the story of ‘attention seeking’ began to be selected out, and the story was told and re-told. As more events were added to this plot, the story of Sean as an ‘attention seeker’ became stronger. So too, the broader cultural understandings of Sean’s actions become obscured – including the fact that stealing is a common act by young men of Sean’s class background in his neighbourhood. All the complexities and contradictions of Sean’s life had been simplified into the understanding that Sean was an ‘attention seeker’.
Thin description
Early in their meetings with people, therapists often hear stories, like the one above, about the problem and the meanings that have been reached about them. These meanings, reached in the face of adversity, often consist of what narrative therapists call ‘thin description’.
Thin description allows little space for the complexities and contradictions of life. It allows little space for people to articulate their own particular meanings of their actions and the context within which they occurred. For example, in the story above, the description of Sean’s behaviour as ‘attention seeking’ was a thin description. It was generated by others (as is often the case with thin descriptions) and left little room for movement.
This thin description of Sean’s actions (attention seeking) obscures many other possible meanings. For all we know, the last thing Sean wanted may have been for his stealing to be given attention! Perhaps these actions had more to do with making a stand for belonging with peers, with acquiring something for his sister, with standing up to the bullying of others, or with establishing himself as a leader in a neighbourhood where leadership for a young man means leading break and enters (robberies). A thin description of ‘attention seeking’ has the potential to leave Sean isolated and disconnected from his parents and his peers, whereas alternative descriptions may open other possibilities.
Often, thin descriptions of people’s actions/identities are created by others – those with the power of definition in particular circumstances (e.g. parents and teachers in the lives of children, health professionals in the lives of those who consult them). But sometimes people come to understand their own actions through thin descriptions. In whatever context thin descriptions are created, they often have significant consequences.
Thin conclusions are often expressed as a truth about the person who is struggling with the problem and their identity. The person with the problem may be understood to be ‘bad’, ‘hopeless’, or ‘a troublemaker’. These thin conclusions, drawn from problem-saturated stories, disempower people as they are regularly based in terms of weaknesses, disabilities, dysfunctions or inadequacies. I can recall many of these thin conclusions that people who have consulted me have been invited into: ‘It’s because I’m a bad person’ or ‘We are a dysfunctional family’.
Once thin conclusions take hold, it becomes very easy for people to engage in gathering evidence to support these dominant problem-saturated stories. The influence of these problematic stories can then become bigger and bigger. In the process, any times when the person has escaped the effects of the problem, any times when they have not been ‘bad’, ‘hopeless’ or ‘a trouble maker’ become less visible. As the problem story gets bigger and bigger it becomes more powerful and will affect future events
Alternative stories
Narrative therapists, when initially faced with seemingly overwhelming thin conclusions and problem stories, are interested in conversations that seek out alternative stories – not just any alternative stories, but stories that are identified by the person seeking counselling as stories by which they would like to live their lives. The therapist is interested to seek out, and create in conversations, stories of identity that will assist people to break from the influence of the problems they are facing.
Just as various thin descriptions and conclusions can support and sustain problems, alternative stories can reduce the influence of problems and create new possibilities for living.
For Sean, for example, an exploration of the alternative stories of his life might create space for change. These would not be stories of being an attention seeker or a problem child. Instead, they might consist of stories of determination throughout his history, or stories of how he overcame troubles in earlier times in his life, or ways in which he gives attention as well as seeks it.
With these ideas about stories informing their work, the key question for narrative therapists becomes: how can we assist people to break from thin conclusions and to re-author new and preferred stories for their lives and relationships?
As Jill Freedman and Gene Combs describe:
Narrative therapists are interested in working with people to bring forth and thicken stories that do not support or sustain problems. As people begin to inhabit and live out the alternative stories, the results are beyond solving problems. Within the new stories, people live out new self images, new possibilities for relationships and new futures. (1996, p.16)
Towards rich and thick description
To be freed from the influence of problematic stories, it is not enough to simply re-author an alternative story. Narrative therapists are interested in finding ways in which these alternative stories can be ‘richly described’. The opposite of a ‘thin conclusion’ is understood by narrative therapists to be a ‘rich description’ of lives and relationships.
Many different things can contribute to alternative stories being ‘richly described’ – not least of which being that they are generated by the person whose life is being talked about. Rich description involves the articulation in fine detail of the story-lines of a person’s life. If you imagine reading a novel, sometimes a story is richly described – the motives of the characters, their histories, and own understandings are finely articulated. The stories of the characters’ lives are interwoven with the stories of other people and events. Similarly, narrative therapists are interested in finding ways for the alternative stories of people’s lives to be richly described and interwoven with the stories of others.

Five clues that you are addicted to Facebook
By Elizabeth Cohen

(CNN) -- One day recently, Cynthia Newton's 12-year-old daughter asked her for help with homework, but Newton didn't want to help her, because she was too busy on Facebook. So her daughter went upstairs to her room and sent an e-mail asking her for help, but Newton didn't see the e-mail, because, well, she was too busy on Facebook.
"I'm an addict. I just get lost in Facebook," Newton said. "My daughter gets so PO'd at me, and really it is kind of pathetic. It's not something I'm particularly proud of. I just get so sucked in."
Newton (that's not her real name; she's embarrassed by her Facebook use and requested anonymity) says she spends about 20 hours a week on the social networking site, half the time for work -- she runs an online business -- and half just for fun. She's tried to cut down on her Facebook use but failed.
"I can go a whole day without Facebook," she said. "But I've never made it through an entire weekend."
Although there are no statistics on "Facebook addiction" -- it isn't an actual medical diagnosis -- therapists say they're seeing more and more people like Newton who've crossed the line from social networking to social dysfunction.
"Last Friday, I had three clients in my office with Facebook problems," said Paula Pile, a marriage and family therapist in Greensboro, North Carolina. "It's turned into a compulsion -- a compulsion to dissociate from your real world and go live in the Facebook world."
Pile and the other therapists interviewed for this article were quick to say that Facebook itself isn't the problem and that the vast majority of its 200 million users probably function just fine.
"I'm on it myself," Pile said. "My daughter just got married, and I got great happiness posting her wedding pictures for all my friends to see."
She says problems arise when users ignore family and work obligations because they find the Facebook world a more enjoyable place to spend time than the real world.
Newton says she checks Facebook first thing when she wakes up, and then she checks her Facebook page as many as seven times while at work, and then she'll check Facebook again when she gets home and one more time before she goes to sleep. If you've been keeping count, that's about 10 times a day.
A single parent, Newton includes "Facebook flirting" with men and meeting up with old schoolmates among her favorite activities.
"One old friend told me he had a huge crush on me in kindergarten, and it tore him apart when we weren't put in the same class in first grade," she said. "When I read that, it was like, wow. I blushed at my computer. I had no idea I was so important to him. It felt very real and warm and dear."
The problem is that it's not real, says Joanna Lipari, a clinical psychologist at the University of California, Los Angeles. She compares Facebook to "The Truman Show," the 1998 Jim Carrey movie about a fabricated world where nothing ever goes wrong.
"Facebook is a fun, pleasant, happy, beautiful world. People only present the crème de la crème of their lives on Facebook. And these people want to be your friends! It's very seductive."
It's especially seductive when real life isn't going so well, Pile adds.
"In real life, people have morning breath, and you have to pay bills with them, and you argue about who's going to change the baby's diaper," she said. "But Facebook is happyland. You don't have to deal with any of that."
Newton says she knows all this and is frustrated at how much time she spends on Facebook, given that she has a job and a child.
"I've thought about going cold turkey, but that would make me so uncomfortable. I know I couldn't do it."
You know you're a Facebook addict when ...
1. You lose sleep over Facebook
"If you're staying up late at night because you're on Facebook, and you're tired the next day, Facebook may be a compulsion for you," Lipari said. "You shouldn't be neglecting yourself because of Facebook."
2. You spend more than an hour a day on Facebook
Pile says it's hard to pinpoint exactly how much is too much time to be spending on social networking.
"I can't imagine that anyone would need more than an hour a day on Facebook, and probably no one needs more than 30 minutes," she said.
3. You become obsessed with old loves
Reconnecting with old friends is one of the great attractions of Facebook, and there's nothing necessarily wrong with "friending" an old boyfriend or girlfriend. But Pile warns that it can get out of hand very quickly.
"One of my clients met up with an old boyfriend on Facebook. They started spending hours and hours into the night talking to each other on Facebook. She made some really inappropriate comments about how unhappy she was in her marriage," Pile said. "Her cousin saw the comments and told her parents, and the parents told the husband, and now they're in the process of getting divorced."
4. You ignore work in favor of Facebook
"If you're not doing your job in order to sneak time on Facebook, you could have a real problem," Lipari said.
5. The thought of getting off Facebook leaves you in a cold sweat
Pile has her own quick test: "Try going a day without Facebook. If you find it causes you a lot of stress and anxiety, you really need to get some help."

She has also devised a longer test that can help you decide if your Facebook use has become a compulsion:

The Facebook Compulsion Inventory

Directions: Please circle your answer to each of the questions using the following scale:
1. Very Untrue. 2. Somewhat Untrue. 3. Neither True nor Untrue. 4. Somewhat True. 5. Very True.

1. I spend more time on Facebook than I intend to. 1 2 3 4 5

2. I feel anxious and upset when I cannot access my Facebook page. 1 2 3 4 5

3. I have more in common with the people I chat with on Facebook than I have with my spouse or partner. 1 2 3 4 5

4. I find myself neglecting some of my work responsibilities because of time I spend on Facebook. 1 2 3 4 5

5. Sometimes I lose sleep because of the time I spend on Facebook. 1 2 3 4 5

6. I have developed romantic feelings for someone I have reconnected with on Facebook. 1 2 3 4 5

7. Spending time on Facebook with my Facebook friends is more pleasant than the time I spend with my spouse or partner. 1 2 3 4 5

8. I lie to others about what I talk to friends about on Facebook. 1 2 3 4 5

9. I feel excited and energized when I access my Facebook page. 1 2 3 4 5

10. I would feel sad and depressed if Facebook ceased to exist. 1 2 3 4 5

11. I have concealed conversations that I have on Facebook from my partner. 1 2 3 4 5

12. I would not want my spouse or partner to be my Facebook friend. 1 2 3 4 5

13. I need to make sure that I have access to my Facebook page on vacations. 1 2 3 4 5

14. I feel that others would think less of me if they could see my private messages on Facebook. 1 2 3 4 5

15. Others have complained about the amount of time I spend on Facebook. 1 2 3 4 5



SCORING

15-30 You probably enjoy using Facebook, however it is unlikely that it is causing major issues in your relationship.

31- 45 You obviously enjoy using Facebook and it is most likely an important part of your life, but it is probably not controlling you.

46-60 Your Facebook use is quite possibly excessive. You may be experiencing some difficulties in your life and relationships as a result of your Facebook use. You may want to consider ways to reconnect and connect with your family and friends that do not involve Facebook. If you continue to find yourself using Facebook as a major way to meet your emotional and social needs, it is important that you put more time back into your primary relationships outside of Facebook, or seek professional help.

60-75 Your Facebook use appears to be compulsive. It would most likely be helpful to seek a professional therapist to help you sort out the role Facebook plays in your life.


Copyright 2009
Paula Pile MA, LMFT, LPA